Sunday, May 28, 2017

Boxelder Conundrum Part ll




These bugs just don't quit. Yesterday while eating the soup of the day at the Bakery, a grandmother told of an Elderbug that invaded her ear and performed an unwelcome Eustachian Waltz. Fortunately, the Boxelder was coaxed to leave the premises in an interesting manner. Practiced in the ways of Elderbug extraction, her son-in-law beamed a light into her ear. Seeing the light, the Elderbug promptly crawled out of her ear and literally into the light of day. This was certainly a relief to the grateful grandmother and most likely for the Elderbug as well. 



So...how do you get rid of Boxelders?

Modern day truth seekers consult the Oracle of Googi. 

And here is some of the advice this truth seeker found:

A mother wrote - "Have been fighting boxelder bugs on and in our house, since the fall of 2014. Have bought a large shop vac, and will be going to the store for a sprayer, ammonia, and lemon dish soap. You can probably relate to my going crazy with killing these bugs all winter! Last fall five different men told me not to worry about them. They said the boxelders would be dead by the start of winter. One was my husband!"

Found the last two sentences to be interesting. Not exactly sure if her husband was assassinated along with the Boxelders.

And here's advice for anyone considering hiring a pro to come in any spray: "Had pros come out to spray, not once but twice, they will be back this Sat. Still have a real problem. Their sprays are not helping. So save money and do it yourself."



Under the heading: How do you get rid of them? the oracle proclaims:


"Remove or kill them by hand. If the infestation is still small, you can literally squash the problem early by stomping on or swatting the bugs when you see them in your yard."

If we followed the stomp, squash and swat advice ("S" cubed) we'd all look crazed dancing around and swatting the air as if demented. 

· More advice:  "Alternatively, you can trap them in jars and release them outside of your yard. Wear gloves when doing this in case you are forced to touch them in the process." 

  Now just think about that for a moment. Trap them in jars and release them outside?? OK, sure, to each their own. If you want to chase them around the house and trap them in jars fine. It's your life. And just don't forget the gloves just in case you actually touch a Boxelder. Yikes!

One truth seeker asked the Oracle of Googi, are box elder bugs poisonous? The answer...

"I have not found any evidence to support box elder bugs being poisonous to any animal, although, they do give off a terrible smell and taste."

One wonders about the poor subject who had to taste and smell Boxelders to provide this evidence. 



"Boxelder bugs are nuisance pests. However, they do not sting or transmit disease, and are generally not known to bite, though there are rare reports of defensive biting." 

Though they are unwelcome guests in our homes, Elderbugs are generally non-aggressive insects. This writer has not been bitten by a Boxelder, however stories do arise claiming that they do bite. As of yet, no one has shown me broken skin evidence of biting Boxelders.  

Here's some more sage advice the Oracle of Googi offered concerning Elderbugs

1.   Preventing box elder bugs from entering a building will reduce this nuisance insect. 

Really? Does this sound a bit like "no duh" advice?

2.   Avoid squishing adults because they can leave a stain on fabrics and can release a foul odor.

This advice says nothing about squishing adolescent Elderbugs. Is that OK?

3.   If your pet is prone to eating bugs, try to steer them clear of tasting a box elder bug.

Yes, try "steering Bosco clear" of Boxelders. "Bosco, stay away from that Elderbug! And that one! And those! And....!"

4.   If “steering clear” doesn’t work and your dog does eat boxelder bug, expect it may become sick and make preparations for that to happen by taking your dog outside or confine it to a room with tile floor. 

Would linoleum work?

5.   If you’re concerned about the well-being of your cat or dog after it consumed a boxelder bug, contact your veterinarian for additional guidance. 

Yep, that’s just what you should do. Use Skype or some emergency line to call the vet who resides more than fifty miles away. Ask them what to do about your boxelder eating feline or canine. Hmmm, does this seem a bit of an overreaction? Beware, contact the vet only if you want friends and neighbors to burst into paroxysms of laughter at your expense. 

6.   Cats seem a little more likely to snack on and tolerate boxelder bugs. 
And that is just one of the reasons we have a cat.

AAACCKKKK!  Boxelders are AWFUl!

Next week - hearing from the other side - 
Boxelder Boosters Respond